Although I think the slogan, “Kick the Habit” is about as wrong-headed as it can be, there is a very strong habit component associated with smoking for all long-term smokers, and the habitual nature of a lot of our smoking can be a real stumbling block when we quit if we’re not prepared to deal with it. This is why I keep talking about eternal vigilance and being conscious and aware of what you’re doing. And the best time to start practicing conscious awareness of your smoking habits is while you’re still smoking (see note below about how to do this after you quit).
Being Unaware
For a lot of us, reaching for the first cigarette of the day as soon as we got out of bed (or even while we were still in bed) was the most natural thing in the world: we didn’t have to think about it; we woke up, reached for the pack, lit one up, and got on with the rest of our morning routine. And if you had (or have) that habit, and you’re not aware of it, you’re much more likely to miss that part of your morning routine after you quit.
Smoking on Autopilot
Smoking becomes such an ingrained, habitual part of so much of our lives that we don’t really think about most of the cigarettes we smoke. Think about it all the “automatic” cigarettes you’ve smoked: did you (or do you) have to think about lighting up a cigarette when you had your morning coffee? Or after you ate? Or when you were on the phone? Or while you were driving? Or while you were watching TV? Or when you had a drink?
After you quit, all of these situations will become reminders that something’s missing from your life, and any one of them could be the one that allows you to justify a relapse (“I really miss that first cigarette of the day…”) unless you’re aware of what’s going on.
Developing Awareness
Here’s an exercise that’s a featured part of several of the quit smoking programs I’ve been through; it has different names in the different programs, but the intent is the same in all of them: to force you to be aware of every cigarette you smoke and why, so you can start to untangle the habitual smoking patterns from the rest of your life:
What You Need
All you need for this exercise is a small notebook that’s about the size of a pack of cigarettes and one of those little pencils that they give you to fill in the blanks on lottery tickets (if you’re not sure what I mean, don’t worry; just take a regular No. 2 pencil and sharpen it until it’s about the length of a cigarette).
Step One
Put the pencil in your cigarette pack and carry the notebook wherever you carry your cigarettes (you may even want to take a rubber band and wrap it around the notebook and your cigarettes, so they’re always together).
Step Two
Now, every time you smoke, write down the time, the general mood you’re in (“happy”, “sad”, or “meh.”) and how much you feel like you “need” that cigarette (“NEED IT BAD!”, “just want one”, or “no reason; just smoking”). Feel free to come up with your own shorthand that will make it easier for you to do this; it’s important that you make a note of every cigarette you smoke.
Rinse and Repeat
Do this for at least three days. Make a note of every single cigarette you smoke, when you’re smoking it, how you feel at the time you’re smoking it, and how badly you feel you “need” that particular cigarette.
After doing this consistently for three days, you’re going to start seeing some definite patterns: what do you notice about them? Is there a pattern to the times of day you smoke? A pattern to your mood or your perceived “need” when you smoke? What do these patterns tell you about your smoking habits?
What if I’ve Already Quit?
If you’ve already quit, you can still do this exercise: leave the cigarettes out of it, but keep a notebook and pencil with you at all times. Whenever you feel a crave, write down the time, your mood, and how strong the crave is; after three days of doing this, you’ll start to see some patterns emerge, too. What do they tell you? How can you use what you learn here to help you stay quit?